School at Home: Good Days and Hard Days

Well, I am in the second week of this school year. It has been eventful. We have made corn cob dolls just like Laura Ingalls had, and learned how to square dance among all the many discoveries brought forth in the academics like learning to read and write and draw. (They drew the funniest pictures of their daddy today) My high schooler is really liking her studies too.

We have had good days and we have had hard days. Today, was particularly hard to get off the ground. It didn't help that I had little sleep last night and that the younger children tend to wake up fighting as soon as their feet hit the floor. I don't understand that. Also, the personality clashes that happen between parent and child sometimes.

We had a learning experience as parents today, though, that makes me proud of my 16 yo daughter. She shared with us that yesterday, on her walk she decided to stop in for a frappachino at, you guessed it, the corner Starbucks when she met this girl just two years older than her behind the counter. This 18 yo girl was elated because she just found out she's pregnant by her boyfriend. Then she starts to tell my daughter that her parents wish her to have an abortion and tell her that they hope she miscarries. My daughter tells her about my having her at 17 and how I chose not to have an abortion. (she lets people know that if I had made that choice, she wouldn't be here today)

I was proud of my girl, sharing with her. This is not the first time she has been so bold and caring to discuss this issue with others. It does my heart good to see that there is no shame in how she came into this world. It is good to see how passionate she is to help hurting people.

I told her today after talking with her about the parents' response to their daughter's news, that there was something I had never shared with her before. I told her about how the second time I had a pregnancy test (my mom had to make sure it was for real, so she took me to another doctor), I asked God to "take this from me". I was fearful of what was to come, how my life would change. I was a pastor's kid! People surely would look down on me and my parents would be embarrassed by me - so I thought. Right then in the car, leaving the doctor's office knowing my life was never going to be the same, I heard God speak to me. To me! A 16 year old rebellious teen who had really messed up, heard from God. He said to me, "This is not cancer, I can not take it away because it is a life. I cannot take life away." I realized then that this was something I had to face and that God would not give me more than I could handle. There was another thing that happened that day, that changed my life forever. I said to my mom all of these "what ifs". "If only I had..." or "If only I hadn't..." and she stopped me dead in my tracks and told me never to talk like that again. She said that I can't go back and change things, and beating myself up would not help anything. That I have to be positive and thank God for providing and for protecting me. That was the best advice I have ever received from anyone. I still hold onto it to this day.

Well, I told my daughter that I was proud of her. I asked her if she felt she had an opportunity to minister to this gal some more. She said, "Yes". What an amazing teen!

So, there are good days and hard days, but when you look at the hard days as an opportunity, they then become good days too. I am so thankful that I have this time at home with my children to have such deep and meaningful conversations. It makes me feel that I am truly doing what God called me to do. : )